Let Life Be Your Friend

Friendliness is the highest form of love. In love, some lust is bound to be there; in friendship, all lust disappears. In friendship, nothing gross remains; it becomes absolutely subtle.

A Matter of Sharing-It is not a question of using the other, not even a question of needing the other, but it is a question of sharing. You have too much and you would like to share. And whosoever is ready to share your joy with you, your dance, your song, you will be grateful to him, you will feel obliged.

Not that he is obliged to you, not that he should feel thankful to you because you have given so much to him.

A friend never thinks that way. A friend always feels grateful to those people who allow him to love them, to give them whatsoever he has got.

Love is greed. You will be surprised to know that the English word ‘love’ comes from a Sanskrit word lobha; lobha means greed. How lobha became love is a strange story. In Sanskrit it is greed; the original root means greed. And love as we know it is really nothing but greed masquerading as love — it is hidden greed.

Making friendships with the idea of using people is taking a wrong step from the very beginning. Friendship has to be a sharing. If you have something, share it — and whosoever is ready to share with you is a friend. It is not a question of need.

It is not a question that when you are in danger, the friend has to come to your aid. That is irrelevant — he may come, he may not come. If he comes, you are grateful, but if he does not come, it’s perfectly okay. It is his decision to come or not to come. You don’t want to manipulate him; you don’t want to make him feel guilty. You will not have any grudge. You will not say to him that, “When I was in need you didn’t turn up — what kind of friend are you?”

Friendship is not something of the market place.

Friendship is one of those rare things which belong to the temple and not to the shop. But you are not aware of that kind of friendship; you will have to learn it.

Not a Natural Instinct-Friendship is a great art. Love has a natural instinct behind it; friendship has no natural instinct behind it. Friendship is something conscious; love is unconscious.

What we call love is more animalistic than human. Friendship is absolutely human. It has something for which there is no inbuilt mechanism in your biology; it is non-biological. Hence, one rises in friendship, one does not fall in friendship. It has a spiritual dimension. When he says that Friendship only rises and does not fall as it is not biological, it means that 'normal' friendship in everyday life is fraught with expectations which are biological in nature, in the sense that it involves emotions. And where emotions are involved one can 'only fall'.

Unconditional love on the other hand is not an emotion it is our nature, it is our being.

If this moment is full of friendship and the fragrance of friendship, why be worried about the next moment? The next moment will be born out of this moment. It is bound to be of a higher, deeper quality. It will bring the same fragrance to a higher altitude. There is no need to think about it — just live the moment in deep friendship.

And friendship need not be addressed to anyone in particular. Rather than creating friendship, create friendliness. Let it become a quality of your being, a climate that surrounds you, so you are friendly with whomsoever you come in contact.

Multi fold Returns-This whole existence has to be befriended! And if you can befriend existence, existence will befriend you a thousand-fold. It returns to you in the same coin but multiplied. It echoes you. If you throw stones at existence, you will be getting back many more stones. If you throw flowers, flowers will be coming back.

Life is a mirror, it reflects your face. Be friendly, and all of life will reflect friendliness.

People know perfectly well that if you are friendly to a dog, even the dog becomes friendly to you. And there are people who have known that if you are friendly to a tree, the tree becomes friendly to you.