HARMONY IN MARRIAGE

PATI PATNI VYAVAHAR

ONE FAMILY

Man and woman have been around forever. They have met each other, married and left each other life after life. This has resulted in complex worldly interactions between the two. In previous eras called Sat, Dwapar and Treta, problems between a man and a woman were nominal because their innate natural characteristics were simple and easily adjustable to each other. Men and women of this era are filled with problems related to innate nature, resulting in differences of opinions, clash and discord. This is the nature of this era called Kaliyug.

Married couples are constantly finding themselves at odds with each other and find no harmony in their life together. So for this era, how is a married couple to find harmony and freedom from constant stress and tension? Is there any scripture or book that they can rely on? What are they to do? For these folks, the exact answers to their daily life questions and problems are available in very simple direct language of the one who has lived a married life and experienced the problems encountered, and has awakened to the true nature of the world and the Self. Probably such kinds of all Questions are answered relating to the interactions between a husband and a wife re being written in my book which shall be published soon.

This book will be compiled from many of questions asked over a forty year period of my life, by individuals and couples who may seek final answers to clash and conflict in marital life.

For the reader who pays attention to this will follow in these my blog articles, the grace of the God will be showered in the form of peace and harmony within and in the home, by the answers to the Questions which bring closure on very intricate and complex problems of married life. These answers will reach the heart of the reader directly and blesses them with the divine vision of looking upon his or her life partner as a Dev or a Devi, celestial beings.

When does one enjoy Married life?

It is when the whole day passes without any stress or worries. How can one enjoy life when there are conflicts at home? Conflicts are unacceptable, especially at home. There may be conflicts at times with neighbors and others, but why at home? At home one should live life as a family. What is family life like? Love should prevail and flow at all times. Where is the family life nowadays? One starts bickering over a meal that is not to his liking. Underdeveloped people! What are the developed people like? They would set aside what they do not like, and eat the rest of the meal. Can this be done? This is a family life. Go quarrel outside? What does ‘my family’ mean? It means that we do not have any conflicts. You should adjust. You should know how to adjust within your family. Adjust everywhere.

Do you have the knowledge of family organization? Our Indians lack the knowledge of how to organize a family. In the foreign countries they do not understand the right concept of family. For them when James turns twenty, his parents, William and Mary will tell him ‘You are now on your own so that we two love birds can be on our own too!’ They do not have the habit of organizing a family. And their family is very frank. If Mary does not get along with William, she will consider a divorce right away. In our country India we never accept the idea of divorce. We stay together, we quarrel and then sleep in the same room. This is not what life is all about. This is not called a family life.

In India, people also have their own family doctor. Why do you have a family doctor, when you do not even have a family? Family doctor means the doctor is part of the family. But the wife is not. The treatment given to the wife is not of the kind you would give to a family member. At times she is treated like a non-family member. When the family doctor comes, they do not quarrel with him. Even if he leaves behind a big bill, they will not argue with him. They’ll say ‘this is our family doctor!” One thinks that he is someone with a status by having his own family doctor!

Do you quarrel with a family member even if he hurts you by accident? No. You should live like a family. You should not pretend. People put up pretenses. It should not be like that, one family. Tell her that you don’t like being separated from her. When she gets upset with you, after a little while just tell her “No matter what you say to me, how upset you get with me, I miss you when you are not here!” Just go ahead and say this ‘Guru Mantra’ (special words that bring great results). You never express your love and appreciation to your wife, do you? What is the problem in doing so? Say, “I do not like being away from you.” You should keep most of your love to yourself, but do share and express some of it.

Some people think that, the world does not function without quarrels. At least there should be some quarrel, sometimes.

Then God would not remain there at all. Wherever there is clash, God will not stay there.

No, there should not be any quarrelling. Why should there be any quarrels? What is the reason for a quarrel? Are you comfortable with quarrels? How many months can you live with conflicts?

Not a single moment.

Not even for a month? You get to eat nice meals, wear beautiful gold jewelry and yet you have to quarrel. It is because you do not know how to live life; you do not know the art of living. That is the cause of quarrels. All we know of is the art of making Money. That is where your thoughts are preoccupied but you never think about how to live life. Shouldn’t you think about this?

We should think about it, but everyone has a different approach.

No, everyone’s ways are not different, they are all the same. Money, Money, Money…. Where can I make Money! And then when one earns some money, he would go to a store and buy something for the house. He brings it home, but does he have to keep looking at it? Then when it becomes old, he has to go and buy another one. All day long he is caught up in a rut, he is unhappy, and he is stressed, stressed and stressed. Alas! How can one live this kind of a life! Does this suit a human being? There should not be any quarrels or conflicts.

How would you define a clash?

Clashes with members of the family, with outsiders, clashes with the wife are all included. If a couple gets into an argument and as a result avoid each other for a while then this event is called a clash. There is no problem if they get together right away after two to three hours of bickering. But when they argue and stay apart, that is called clash. If they stay apart for twelve hours then the whole night is spent in clash.

This tendency to quarrel, is it more prevalent in a man or a woman?

Women have more of this tendency.

What is the reason for that?

There are two categories of clash, minor clash and major clash. Men tend to get into a quarrel of the type that does not last. They forget and let go quickly. This is minor clash. Women on the other hand do not recover from a quarrel that easily and they tend to remember it for a long time. They simply cannot let go easily. This is a major clash, because it is prolonged. Sometimes they even make a big issue of a minor quarrel because of the way they are. For example after a minor disagreement the husband walks about as if nothing has happened but the wife walks around with a sulky face as if she has been starved for three days.

So what should one do to avoid major clash?

If you do not light a minor fire she will not turn it into a major fire. The fault is yours for igniting a fire in the first place when you tell her that her food tastes awful. You don’t like the food she has prepared, and so you go around with a frown on your face. All these trivial things give rise to a minor clash, which will lead to a major clash. The important thing is that there should be peace at home.

But how can peace prevail?

For peace, one has to understand religion. You should tell everyone at home, “We are not each other’s enemies; nobody has any quarrels with anyone. There is no need to have differences of opinion. Let us share with each other what we have and let us be happy.” That is how we should think and do everything. One should never quarrel with people at home. How can you quarrel with the people with whom you have to share the same home? Nobody has ever been happy by making others miserable and we want to be happy by giving happiness. We can only be happy if we make others happy at home. You will be served a good cup of tea with a smile if you avoid clash with this understanding. Otherwise they will ruin the tea and then serve us.

Look how many worries and inner differences there are! A person does not get rid of even a trace of differences of opinion, and yet he thinks that he is religious. Ask him if clash has ceased at home? Have they even decreased? Have your worries become less? Do you have at least some peace? To that he will say: “No, but at least I practice religion.” You fool! What religion do you have? Being religious means you are at peace within and are not subject to any stress, internal or external, regardless of your worldly situation. To revert to your Real nature is the final definition of religion.

If your wife was holding a stack of dishes and glassware and she drops them, would you be affected by it?

You cannot avoid saying something when you are affected or hurt. You cannot prevent turning on your ‘radio’. The moment you get hurt, your ‘radio’ will come on, which in turn will hurt her. Then she will say, ‘As if you never break anything in your life.’ This is very important to understand. These dishes do break don’t they? If you tell her to break the dishes, she would not, would she? What is it that breaks them? There is no person in this world with an independent strength to break even a single dish. All of these are accounts that are being settled. If anything breaks through the medium of your wife, ask gently, “Are you hurt my dear?”

If you fight over a couch, then throw that couch away. That couch is worth only a few hundred dollars. Is it worth fighting over? It will only sow the seeds of hate. Just get rid of it. Anything that causes conflicts in the home should be thrown away.

The more you understand, the greater your faith. With faith’ results will follow. Without faith it will not help. If you do things with understanding, your life will be happy and it will make her life happy too. Doesn’t she make you wonderful meals? Doesn’t she make you wonderful meals?

Yes, she does.

What more then? Shouldn’t you be obligated to her because she is your partner? And what is her obligation in this? You bring home the money, and she does all this for you. This is the way a partnership works. The children are the product of your partnership. They are not solely hers, are they? Just because she went though pregnancy does that mean they belong only to her? Children belong to both of you. Do they belong to you both or her alone?

Yes, Both of us. Yes.

Are the men going to go through pregnancy? So this world is worth understanding. It needs to be understood from many different viewpoints. Only your inner being in peace can make you understand this world as is. It makes you understand what is good or bad for you. Then there will be an end to clashes at home.

Lord Krishna has said that there are two kinds of intellect; the helpful intellect and the harmful intellect. The harmful intellect brings forth only pain and misery. The helpful intellect brings forth happiness and seeks out happiness in the midst of pain and suffering. In Foreign country you get such good food, pure ghee, and pure yogurt. Life is easy but people do not know how to live. That is why they suffer.

We should be thinking about what is beneficial to us. What is beneficial of the two; remembering the happiness of the day you got married or remembering the sorrow of the day you became a widower?

Can a thought of becoming a widower at that young age during your marriage ceremony?

When you were wearing an elaborate turban of the kind the princely classes wear during marriage. Dressed in this manner even as a twenty-five year-old groom you looked very handsome. And your attire was bedecked and impressive. Later on as the wedding ceremony was going on the turban got slightly displaced on your head. It occurred to you then that it is good that you are getting married. It is a good thing that has happened but one day one of you will have to become a widow or widower.

Yes, alas! Wouldn’t one of the wheels break? Whatever is built has to break one day.

The intense desire to experience marriage makes you forget you’re real self. Where is the time for such thoughts of detachment in marriage?

But at that time a thought can not be occurred to you that whatever has started will come to an end. Of the two of you, one of you will be widowed. Either it will be her or it will be you.

When you got married in the presence of so may guests and relatives, with the Sun God and the priest as your witness, the mantra chanted by the priest was, ’Samaya varte savdhan’. (Exercise caution according to the event in time) When the priest says “Samaya varte savdhan!” Also the Promises are repeated in front of Deity and all guests present in the Marriage ceremony, but what does the person getting married understand? What does this mantra mean? It means that when the wife loses her temper, you should remain calm, and alert. Only then you qualify for the marriage. If she gets angry and you also get angry, then you have not exercised caution in time. When she gets upset, we should calm everything down. Isn’t it necessary to be cautious?

What is the root cause of clash?

Tremendous ignorance! One does not know how to live in this world. One does not know how to be a father. One does not know how to be a husband or how to be a wife. One does not know the art of living. With all the material benefits and conveniences there is still so much misery. Within the ocean of bliss one still searches for a drop of water.

But isn’t the quarreling due to the differences in personality?

It is because of ignorance. In this world no two personalities can ever match. After acquiring this Gyana (Knowledge), there is only one solution; adjust everywhere.

What should you do if your wife does not enjoy cooking?

Change your preferences to other dishes. There are many other varieties of dishes. Change your preferences. If you don’t like a certain flavor, then have her change the spices. That way you will like it. What is there to eat in pizza?

So if you organize your life in this manner, your life will run smoothly. In the morning if you devote half an hour to your prayers and devotional singing, then things will fall into place. You have received knowledge already, so now you have become wise. But others, who do not have knowledge, will need to do some devotional rituals and singing. You are now on the right path.

This Akram Vignan does not interfere with your worldly interactive life. All other forms of spiritual knowledge have relative contempt for worldly life. This Science does not offend worldly life interactions in the least bit. It remains within the confines of its ‘reality’ and does not offend anything at all.

The ultimate ‘light’ is where not even a single being is hurt in the slightest degree. Even your opponent will be pacified. If you have any opponents, they will say ‘We both have differences of opinion, but at the same time I have a lot of respect towards him’. They will speak in this manner; there is opposition for sure. In the same token, there is opposition everywhere. There will always be opposition. There is opposition to the Gynani as well as the fully enlightened Tirthankara. In the same manner, there is opposition everywhere. Not everyone can see the same viewpoint. Not everyone can come to the same level of thinking.

At home your interactions should be filled with harmony. In your home your wife will feel that she will not be able to find another husband like this anywhere, and the husband will feel that he will never get a wife like her. When this happens your life together has been worth living.

The qualities of a woman from India

These are all our moral values. I will tell you my Mother’s instance Even though they may have quarreled for years they lived together, on the thirteenth day, after the death of her husband/ my father, in the ritual ceremony for the dead husband/my father- She remembers, ‘Tere Pitaji aise they ! He used to do/tell like this and that.’ Even then, she will not hesitate to say, “I will not find another husband like him!” Throughout his whole life he lived by the principle that there should not be any commerce in religion, and in all commerce there must be religion. Also he never took any money from anyone for his own use.

Where there is conflict, God will not reside there. So we can tell God, “Sir, you can stay in the temples, do not come to my home. We will construct more temples, but do not come to our home.” God dwells where there is no clash. I give you a guarantee on this. God leaves as soon as clash starts. As soon as God leaves, people will tell us that the business is not running well. This is because God has departed. Business will run smoothly as long as God is present. Do you enjoy quarrelling?

ALEXANDER - The Great's

Last 3 Wishes

Alexander, after conquering many kingdoms, was returning home. On the way, he fell ill and it took him to his death bed. With death staring him in his face, Alexander realized how his conquests, his great army, his sharp sword and all his wealth were of no consequence.

He now longed to reach home to see his mother's face and bid her his last adieu. But, he had to accept the fact that his sinking health would not permit him to reach his distant homeland.

So, the mighty conqueror lay prostrate and pale, helplessly waiting to breathe his last. He called his generals and said, "I will depart from this world soon, I have three wishes, please carry them out without fail."

With tears flowing down their cheeks, the generals agreed to abide by their king's last wishes.

1) "My first desire is that", said Alexander,

"My physicians alone must" carry my coffin."

2) After a pause, he continued,

"Secondly, I desire that when my coffin is being carried to the grave, the path leading to the graveyard be strewn with gold, silver and precious stones which I have collected in my treasury".

3) The king felt exhausted after saying this. He took a minute's rest and continued.
"My third and last wish is that both my hands be kept dangling out of my coffin".

The people who had gathered there wondered at the king's strange wishes. But no one dared bring the question to their lips. Alexander's favorite general kissed his hand and pressed them to his heart.

"O king, we assure you that all your wishes will be fulfilled. But tell us why do you make such strange wishes?"

At this Alexander took a deep breath and said:

"I would like the world to know of the three lessons I have just learnt.

Lessons to be learnt from last 3 wishes of King Alexander...

I want my physicians to carry my coffin because people should realize that no doctor on this earth can really cure any body. They are powerless and cannot save a person from the clutches of death.

So let not people take life for granted.

The second wish of strewing gold, silver and other riches on the path to the graveyard is to tell People that not even a fraction of gold will come with me. I spent all my life Greed of Power, earning riches but cannot take anything with me.

Let people realize that it is a sheer waste of time to chase wealth.

And about my third wish of having my hands dangling out of the coffin, I wish people to know that I came empty handed into this world and empty handed I go out of this world".

With these words, the king closed his eyes.

Soon he let death conquer him and breathed his last. . . .

LESSON TO LEARN:

Remember, your Health is in your own hands, look after it.

Wealth is only meaningful if you can share and also enjoy while you are still alive, kicking & healthy.

What you do for yourself dies with you.

But what you do for others will live for ever.

Leave the Legacy behind.

Scientific Spirituality:

The Religion of the Future

The universe comes out of the union of two fundamental forces: matter (jada, or 'that which gives shape') and consciousness (chetana). These are also respectively known as prakrati (the manifested form) and purusha (the invisible enlivening spirit). Both have their own merits when considered in isolation; however, it is the union and co-operation of these two entities that works wonders. The human body is a very good example of this fact. Our body is made up of five basic elements – the pancha tatvas [The five basic elements of the gross manifestation of Nature. Namely, prithvi (solid matter on or inside the earth), jala (water, liquids and fluidic substances), vayu (air and gaseous elements), agni (source of fire and energy) and akasha (the subliminal etheric expansion)]. The body is an integrated form of various organs, muscles, nerves, arteries, veins etc., and can be used to accomplish any desired work but is non-functional without consciousness. The consciousness part of man (termed "the soul") thinks, decides and directs organs towards a particular task. The separation of consciousness from matter results in death. A dead body is useless since it is not functional. In the absence of consciousness, it rapidly decays and its constituting elements eventually dissolve into their cosmic states.

In essence, it is the association of matter and consciousness that gives rise to functionality. Matter alone, otherwise, is unorganized and of very little use even though it is present in abundance in the universe. For example, water is plentiful in oceans but is too salty. The atmosphere is full of gases, electro-magnetic rays, X-rays etc. but these components are not useful on their own. It is the human intervention, or alternatively the intervention of developed consciousness, that organizes matter so as to make it useful. For example, man has developed methods to process water to make it fit for human consumption. Fire and electricity were present in the universe since times immemorial, but man’s intelligence organized these entities in an utilizable form. Thus, although the components of Nature are powerful in their own right, their usefulness has depended on the inventive skills of human consciousness.

Science and spirituality:

The discovery of the powers of Nature, their organization and the skills that make them useful to man is called science. Science can thus be called the unison of matter and consciousness. Science has made possible the progress of the human civilization.

It should be noted that the knowledge of the use of matter is not enough; its righteous use should also be considered. The same criterion also applies to consciousness. In the absence of their righteous use, matter and consciousness are open to be abused. The attraction of immediate gains is such that its long-term effects are not appreciated and this shortsighted judgment prompts man to misuse power. Ultimately, he creates a web in which he gets trapped, just like a fish caught in a net. This results in suffering, public anger and self-destruction, and yet it is a practice generally adopted by most people. The society and the government rarely succeed in preventing such practices....

Science can be legitimately credited for the current progress and prosperity, but it is incapable of differentiating between use and abuse. The only way to control its misuse is to incorporate wisdom based on foresightedness and the nobilities associated with human glory. This is the essence of spirituality. Spirituality means, "centered and established on the soul", that is, activities in life are designed keeping the awakening of the soul as the aim. The soul is the individualized consciousness present in the human body.

Consciousness is more powerful than matter. As discussed earlier, it is the miracle of consciousness that organizes matter in an orderly way. However, unrestrained consciousness has drawbacks too. For example, it is easy to find faults in others, but does anyone try to observe his own self for their own faults? Usually, an individual is biased towards his shortcomings and considers him self the best. A person trying to prove him self right will present several arguments in his favour. This distorts the reality and generates undesirable thoughts.

The dual accomplishment of the righteous use of science and the refinement of consciousness is possible only through spirituality.

The great divide:

Since the 17th century, when modern science made its first appearance, it has clashed with religion/spirituality. At the root of the clash lie two streams of beliefs. Science believes everything is made up of matter and therefore ought to be demonstrable through experiments.

A spiritualist insists that pure Spirit is reality, not matter. The great Indian seer-sage Sri Aurobindo has termed the scientific viewpoint as "the materialist denial" and the spiritual viewpoint as "the refusal of the ascetic" in his magnum opus The Life Divine. Discussing these issues further, Sri Aurobindo says the premise of science is that the physical senses are our only means of obtaining knowledge. Therefore, reason cannot transcend the reach of the senses and so, says Sri Aurobindo, "it must deal always and solely with the facts which they [the senses] provide or suggest." Science says that we cannot go beyond our senses and cannot use them "as a bridge leading us into a domain where more powerful and less limited faculties come into play…" In other words, science denies the existence of anything that is supernatural, super physical or extrasensory. In doing so, science assumes Nature to be an unintelligent substance or energy and uses this excuse to refuse, in the words of Sri Aurobindo, "to extend the limits of inquiry". However, science has come to a stage where prominent scientists accept that there are several phenomena, backed by compelling evidences, which cannot be explained by the current formulations of scientific theories and laws, but only by the presence of an unthinkable, omniscient Intelligence. Examples include: the behaviour of Earth as a single living organism, telepathy, precognition, the presence of a Universal Mind, etc.

Sri Aurobindo says the spiritualist believes that pure Spirit is a reality because there are super physical realities that are beyond the grasp of the senses, based on principles other than those that govern gross matter. Therefore, it is not justifiable to reject them as "false positives". For a spiritualist, consciousness is the unifying factor in the universe, which Sri Aurobindo calls "the universal witness for whom the world is a field", while "the senses are [its] mere instruments". The spiritualist considers the material universe as unreal.

What are the consequences of these two streams of beliefs? Both are seriously flawed, according to Sri Aurobindo. A mixture of matter and consciousness gives a meaningful functionality. If we adopt a purely materialistic view, Sri Aurobido says we arrive at a māyā "that is [present] and yet is not [present]". We see the physical aspects of the universe and so māyā is present and compelling, leading us to believe what we see is the only reality. Yet, māyā "is not", because it is transitory. Transformation is the principle of the universe. On the other hand, the refusal of material existence leads, in Sri Aurobindo’s view, to the development of ego and the purposelessness of the human existence.

In the modern times, the conflict between science and spirituality has further deepened. They have become two separate streams in practice. Both are in a muddled state of affairs and each falsely believes to be complete in its own right. As a result the worldview has become fragmented and has led to manifold problems, a view endorsed by modern thinkers. Eminent physicist David Bohm explains this extremely well in his book Wholeness and the Implicate Order. He says that everything is treated as separate, rather than as a part of "something bigger and wider"; thus we have separate religions, separate sciences, separate subjects, separate nations, separate societies, separate families etc. And how does this view act as a precursor to problems? Bohm provides a simple answer:

"The notion that all these fragments are separately existent is evidently an illusion, and this illusion cannot do other than lead to endless conflict and confusion. Indeed, the attempt to live according to the notion that the fragments are really separate is, in essence, what has led to the growing series of extremely urgent crises that is confronting us today. Thus, as is now well known, this way of life has brought about pollution, destruction of the balance of nature, over-population, world-wide economic and political disorder, and the creation of an overall environment that is neither physically nor mentally healthy for most of the people to live in."

In his best-selling book The Tao of Physics, physicist Fritj of Capra says:

"Our tendency to divide the perceived world into individual and separate things and to experience ourselves as isolated egos in this world is seen as an illusion [in the East] which comes from our measuring and categorizing mentality."

Mankind has enormously suffered this conflict between science and spirituality. A person cannot ride a bicycle if one of its wheels is missing. Time has now come for both science and spirituality to widen their thinking horizons and realize the importance of their alliance, since the future of mankind rests on their combined insight and wisdom. How could this be achieved? Sri Aurobindo provides an answer. He says:

"Only by an extension of the field of our consciousness or an unhoped-for increase in our instruments of knowledge can this ancient quarrel be decided."

Kundalini : The Serpentine Fire of Super Vital Force

One of the most talked about, mysterious and hard disciplines of spiritual yoga are the kundalini sadhana. The philosophy of this grand sadhana deals with the awakening, transformation and refinement of kama (sex-energy).

The awakened power of kundalini transforms or reorients the psychological components of sexual desire into pure affection, reverence, faith, artistic talents, courage, optimism, velour, tolerance, sense of responsibility, altruism, asceticism, etc. In simple illustrative terms, the control and optimal utilization of the vital power of sex-energy under the disciplines of kundalini sadhana could be likened to the building up of dams and reservoirs for river and rain waters and networking of canals, which not only prevent the calamities of floods but also offer useful irrigation facilities.

Mental impulses of cravings and erotic thoughts are the greatest hurdles in the path of self-discipline and self-control. These need to be curbed and controlled by equally forceful and penetrating positive thoughts and emotional currents. Iron cuts iron. Trenchancy of positive thinking and pure intellect indeed have this power, which, like the divine light of Lord Shiva’s Third eye can set ablaze the evil instincts of Kamadeva the God of amour, the source of our passions. Swadhayaya and satsang (Enlightening discourses, discussions and study of the sagacious thoughts and glorious works of great personalities on different aspects of life.) also offer the necessary support for psychological refinement. These help us to be attentive and equipped with prudent thoughts and firm resolve to counter the onslaught of passionate instincts, illusive and alluring attractions and wayward thoughts as soon as the latter emerge in or attack our mental and emotional world.

A thief dares entering a lonely house or when every one in the house is fast asleep; even a little sound such as a small child’s cry or an old man’s cough, would scare him away and the fear of someone getting up would force him flee back. If we are alert and prepared with the army of sane, positive thoughts and arguments, no evil instinct, craving or wrong thought could stay for long in our mind. We have to constantly fight this Mahabharata in our inner world. Our wisdom, our discerning thoughts and emotional piety inspired by recalling and pondering over the glorious victories of great personalities in similar circumstances, by the constructive thoughts of our own dignity, of human values, would eventually make us victorious. This is the essence of the eternal and universal message of The Gita given by the Divine Teacher to His friend and disciple Arjuna.

The power of kundalini is described in the spiritual literature as the source of kama, the creative sex energy indwelling the muladhara chakra. It is said to be the generator of ambitions, enthusiasm and cheerfulness. Kundalinii is depicted in some of the yoga scriptures as a female serpent lying coiled up and dormant in the muladhara. The downward secretions through the genital organs are described as the poisonous discharges of this serpent. If activated (by rigorous sadhanas of kundalini jagarana under the adept guidance of a spiritual master), the upward flow of this latent elixir stimulates the extrasensory energy field of kama and inspires creativity, youthfulness, optimism and joy; thus paving the way for spiritual enlightenment and attainment of supernatural capabilities.

Kundalini jagarana is an arduous sadhana. Its simile with the ’churning of an ocean’ appears to be quite appropriate. The latent force of the vital energy is refined and gradually activated in this process. This activated current of prana rises up from the muladhara and enters the brahmrandhras (The ’inlets’ of the sahastrara chakra.) as a quavering wave through the sushumna nadi.

The sahastrara chakra is likened to a divine lotus in the rhetoric style of the ancient scriptures on yoga and meditation. Lotus is regarded as the symbol of divine purity and of celestial beauty and art in the Indian culture. The scriptures depict the Goddess Lakshmi as sitting on a lotus. Four-armed Lord Vishnu is shown to hold a padma (lotus) in one hand and shankha, chakra and gada in the three others.

The sahastrara chakra in the subtle body like the brain in the physical body is indeed the most important link for the existence and manifestation of the individual consciousness and for the linkage of the jivatma with its absolute origin, Parmatma. During meditation, this essence of spiritual energy is concentrated upon as the reservoir of the Supreme Powers of Lords Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva.

The occult science of the sadhana of kundalini jagarana is regarded as Brahm-Vidya [the supreme knowledge of the Brahm (Absolute Truth, Knowledge and Bliss. The eternal expression of cosmic Consciousness. )]. It is not available in a detailed / complete form in the present era except in the memories of the rare, truly awakened spiritual masters who have attained highest levels of self- realization.

The ’rise’ in the level of the latent vital energy residing in the muladhara and its union with the Supreme Consciousness Force in the sahastrara through the arousal of the gigantic force of kundalini results in the enlightened charging and sublimation of kama into its original Divine Bliss. It is indeed the highest state of accomplishment of brahmcharya, in which the power of kama is not only completely protected from being debased in the disgusting act of carnal sex but is also sublimated and transmuted into its pure, eternal form of Divine Bliss. The sacred power of spiritualised kama awakens the divinity hidden in the human self. Attainment of supernatural talents and purity of sentiments are only by-products of this Supreme transformation.

Aging Process…. Insightful

We all accept that getting older is inevitable, and now leading clinicians have revealed the exact age when different body parts start to decline, most alarming being the brain and lungs.

French doctors have found that the quality of man’s sperm start deteriorate by 35, so that by the time a man is 45 a third of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Here, with the help of leading clinicians, Angela Epstein tells the ages when different parts of the body start to lose their battle with time.

BRAIN- starts ageing at 20. As we get older, the numbers of Nerve cells- or neurons- in the brain decrease. We start with around 100 billion, but in our 20s this number starts to decline. By 40, we could be losing up to 10,000 per day, affecting memory, co-ordination and brain function.

GUT- starts ageing at 55. A healthy gut has a good balance between harmful and ‘friendly’ bacteria. But, levels of friendly bacteria in the gut drops significantly after 55, particularly in the large intestine, says Tom MacDonald, Professor of immunology at Barts and the London Medical School.

As a result, we suffer from poor digestion and an increased risk of gut disease. Constipation is more likely as we age, as the flow of digestive juices from the stomach, liver, pancreas and small intestine slows down.

BRESTS- Starts ageing at 35. By their mid-30s, women’s breasts start losing tissue and fat, reducing size and fullness. Sagging starts properly at 40 and the areola (the area surrounding the nipple) can shrink considerably.

BLADDER- Starts ageing at 65. Loss of bladder control is more likely when you hit 65. Women are more vulnerable to bladder problems as after the menopause declining estrogen levels make tissues in the urethra- the tube through which urine passes- thinner and weaker, reducing bladder support. Bladder capacity in an older adult generally is about half that of a younger person- about two cups in a 30 years old and one cup in a 70 year old.

LUNGS- Starts ageing at 20. Lung capacity slowly starts to decrease from the age of 20. By the age of 40, some people are already experiencing breathlessness. This is partly because the muscles and the rib cage which control breathing stiffen up

VOICE- Starts ageing at 65. Our voices become quieter and hoarser with age. The soft tissues in the voice box (Larynx) weaken, affecting the pitch, loudness and quality of the voice.

A woman voice may become huskier and lower in pitch, where as a man’s might become thinner and higher.

EYES- Starts ageing at 40. Glasses are the norm for many over 40s as failing eyesight kicks in- usually long-sightedness, affecting our ability to see objects up close.

HEART- Starts ageing at 40. The heart pumps blood less effectively around the body as we get older. This is because blood vessels become less elastic, while arteries can harden or become blocked because of fatty deposits forming on the coronary arteries- caused by eating too much saturated fat. The blood supply to the heart is then reduced, resulting in painful angina. Men over 45 and women over 55 are at greater risk of a heart attack.

LIVER- Starts ageing at 70. This is the only organ in the body which seems to defy the ageing process. It is the most trust worthy of all our organs. (So do not damage it at least with your deliberate actions!)

KIDNEYS- Starts ageing at 50. With kidneys, the number of filtering units (nephrons) that remove waste from the bloodstream starts to reduce in middle age.

PROSTATE- Starts ageing at 50. The prostate often becomes enlarged with age, leading to problems such as increased need to urinate, says Professor Roger Kirby, director of the Prostate Centre in London. This is known as benign prostates hyperplasia and affects half of men over 50, but rarely those under 40. It occurs when the prostate absorbs large amounts of the male sex hormone testosterone, which increases the growth of cells in the prostate. A normal prostate is the size of a walnut, but the condition can increase this to the size of a tangerine.

BONES- Starts ageing at 35. Throughout our life, old bone is broken down by cells called osteoclasts and replaced by bone- building cell called osteoclasts – a process called bone turnover, ‘explains Robert Moots, Professor of Rheumatology at Aintree University Hospital in Liverpool.

Children’s bone growth is rapid- the skeleton takes just two years to renew itself completely. In adults, this can take ten years. Until our mid-20s, bone density is still increasing. But at 35 bones loss begins as part of the natural ageing process.

TEETH- Starts ageing at 40. Ax we age, we produce less saliva, which washes away bacteria, so teeth and gums are more vulnerable to decay. Receding gums- when tissue is lost from gums around the teeth- is common in adults over 40.

MUSCLES- Starts ageing at 30. Muscles is constantly being built up and broken down, a process which is well balanced in young adults. However, by the time we’re 30, breakdown is greater than buildup, explains Professor Robert Moots. Once adults reach 40. They start to lose between 05 and 02 per cent of their muscle each year. Regular exercise can help prevent this.

HEARING- Starts ageing mid-50s. More than half of people over 60 lose hearing because of their age, according to the Royal National Institute for the deaf.

SKIN- Starts ageing mid-20s. The skin starts to age naturally in your mid 20s.

TASTE and SMELL- Starts ageing at 60. We start out in life with about 10,000 taste buds scattered on the tongue. These numbers can halves later in life. After we turn 60, taste and smell gradually decline, partly as a result of the normal ageing process

FERTILITY- Starts ageing at 35. Female fertility begins to decline after 35, as the number and quality of eggs in the ovaries start to fall. The lining of the womb may become thinner, making it less likely for a fertilized egg to take, and also creating an environment hostile to sperm.

Hair- Starts ageing at 30. Male hair loss usually begins in the 30s. Hair is made in tiny pouches just under the skin’s surface, known as follicles. A hair normally grows from each follicle for about three years, is then shed, and a new hair grows. Most people will have some grey hair by the age of 35. When we are young, our hair is coloured by the pigments produced by cell in the hair follicle known as melanocytes.

Spontaneous illumination through Guru Kripa

It is said that through cosmic serendipity the teacher appears the moment the seeker is ready to receive spiritual illumination and revelation. This is exactly that happened to the world renowned spiritual seeker, Paul Brunton in 1931, while he was meditating in the presence of Raman Maharishee at his Ashram in Tiruvannamalai (Tamil Nadu).

In Paul Brunton’s own words – as recorded in his universally acclaimed master piece – “A search in secret India." The spiritual encounter and experience the vivid and enchanting account of this experience.

I return hastily from an exploration of some usually veiled sanctuaries of the great temple and enter the hall when the evening meditation period has run out half its life. I slip quietly to the floor and straightway assume my regular meditation posture. In a few seconds I compose myself and bring all wandering thoughts to a strong center. An intense interiorisation of consciousness comes with the closing of eyes.

The Maharishee’s seated form floats in a vivid manner before my mind’s eyes. Following his frequently repeated instruction I endeavour to pierce through the mental picture into that which is formless, his real being and inner nature, his soul. To my surprise the effort meets with almost instantaneous success and the picture disappears again, leaving me with nothing more than a strongly felt sense of his intimate presence.

The mental questionings, which have marked most of my earlier meditations, have lately begun to cease. I have repeatedly interrogated my consciousness of physical, emotional and mental sensations in turn, but, dissatisfied in the quest of self, have eventually left them all. I have then applied the attention of consciousness to its own center, striving to become aware of its place of origin. Now comes the supreme moment. In that concentration of stillness, the mind withdrawn into itself, one’s familiar world begins to fade off into shadowy vagueness. One is apparently environed for a while by sheer nothingness, having arrived at a kind of mental blank wall. And one has to be as intense as possible to maintain one’s fixed attention. But how hard to leave the lazy dalliance of our surface life and draw the mind inwards to a pin-point of concentration!

Tonight I flash swiftly to this point, with barely a skirmish against the continuous sequence of thoughts, which usually play the prelude to its arrival. Some new and powerful force comes into dynamic action within my inner world and bears me inwards with resistless speed. The first great battle is over, almost without a stroke, and a pleasurable, happy, easeful feeling succeeds its high tension.

In the next stage I stand apart from the intellect, conscious that it is thinking, but warned by an intuitive voice that it is merely an instrument. I watch these thoughts with a weird detachment. The power to think, which has hitherto been a matter for merely ordinary pride, now becomes a thing from which to escape, for I perceive with startling clarity that I have been its unconscious captive. There follows the sudden desire to stand outside the intellect and just be. I want to dive into a place deeper than thought. I want to know what it will feel like to deliver myself from the constant bondage of the brain, but to do so with all my attention awake and alert.

It is strange enough to be able to stand aside and watch the very action of the brain as though it were someone else’s, and to see how thoughts take their rise and then die, but it is stranger still to realize intuitively that one is about to penetrate into the mysteries which hide the innermost recesses of man’s soul. I feel like some Columbus about to land on an uncharted continent. A perfectly controlled and subdued anticipation quietly thrills me.

But how to divorce oneself from the age-old tyranny of thoughts? I remember that the Maharishee has never suggested that I should attempt to force the stoppage of thinking. "Trace thought to its place of origin," is his reiterated counsel, "Watch for the real self to reveal itself, and then your thoughts will die down of their own accord." So, feeling that I have found the birthplace of thinking, I let go of the powerfully positive attitude which has brought my attention to this point and surrender myself to complete passivity, yet still keeping as intently watchful as a snake of its prey.

This poised condition reigns until I discover the correctness of the sage’s prophecy. The waves of thought naturally begin to diminish. The workings of logical rational sense drop towards zero point. The strangest sensation I have experienced till now grips me. Time seems to reel dizzily as the antennae of my rapidly growing intuition begin to reach out into the unknown. The reports of my bodily senses are no longer heard, felt, remembered. I know that at any moment I shall be standing outside things, on the very edge of the world’s secret.

Finally it happens. Thought is extinguished like a snuffed candle. The intellect withdraws into its real ground, that is, consciousness working unhindered by thoughts. I perceive, what I have suspected for some time and what the Maharishee has confidently affirmed, that the mind takes its rise in a transcendental source. The brain has passed into a state of complete suspension, as it does in deep sleep, yet there is not the slightest loss of consciousness. I remain perfectly calm and fully aware of who I am and what is occurring. Yet my sense of awareness has been drawn out of the narrow confines of the separate personality; it has turned into something sublimely all embracing. Self still exists, but it is a changed, radiant self. For something that is far superior to the unimportant personality which was I, some deeper, diviner being rises into consciousness and becomes me. With it arrive an amazing new sense of absolute freedom, for thought is like a loom-shuttle which is always going to and fro, and to be freed from its tyrannical motion is to step out of prison into the open air.

I find myself outside the rim of world consciousness. The planet, which has so far harboured me, disappears. I am in the midst of an ocean of blazing light. The latter, I feel rather than think, is the primeval stuff out of which worlds are created, the first state of matter. It stretches away into untellable infinite space, incredibly alive.

I touch, as in a flash, the meaning of the mysterious universal drama, which is being enacted in space, and then return to the primal point of my being. I, the new I, rest in the lap of holy bliss. I have drunk the Platonic Cup of Lethe, so that yesterday’s bitter memories and to-morrow’s anxious cares have disappeared completely. I have attained a divine liberty and an almost indescribable felicity. My arms embrace all creation with profound sympathy, for one understands in the deepest possible way that to know all is not merely to pardon all, but to love all. My heart is remolded in rapture.

How shall I record these experiences through which I next pass, when they are too delicate for the touch of my pen? Yet the starry truths, which I learn, may be translated into the language of earth, and the effort will not be a vain one. So I seek, all too roughly, to bring back some memorials of the wonderful archaic world that stretches out, untracked and un-pathed, behind the human mind.

1. Man is grandly related and a greater Being suckled him than his mother. In his wiser moments he may come to know this.

2. Once, in the far days of his own past, man took an oath of lofty allegiance and walked, turbaned in divine grandeur with the gods. If today the busy world calls to him with imperious demand and he gives himself up to it, there are those who have not forgotten his oath and he shall be reminded of it at the appropriate hour.

3. There is that in man which belongs to an imperishable race. He neglects his true self almost completely, but his neglect can never affect or alter its shining greatness. He may forget it and I entirely go to sleep in the senses, yet on the day when it stretches forth its hand and touches him, he shall remember who he is and recover his soul.

4. Man does not put the true value upon himself because he has lost the divine sense. Therefore he runs after another man’s opinion, when he could find complete certitude more surely in the spiritually authoritative center of his own being. The Sphinx surveys no earthly landscape. Its unflinching gaze is always directed inwards, and the secret of its inscrutable smile is self- knowledge.

5. He who looks within himself and perceives only discontent, frailty, darkness and fear, need not curl’ his lip in mocking doubt. Let him look deeper and longer, deeper and longer, until he presently becomes aware of faint tokens and breath-like indications, which appear when the heart is still. Let him heed them well, for they will take life and grow into high thoughts that will cross the threshold of his mind like wandering angels, and these again shall become forerunners of a voice which will come later -the voice of a hidden, recondite and mysterious being who inhabits his center, who is his own ancient self.

6. The divine nature reveals itself a new in every human life, but if a man walks indifferently by, and then the revelation is as seed on stony ground. No one is excluded from this divine consciousness; it is man who excludes himself. Men make formal and pretentious enquiry into the mystery and meaning of life, when all the while each bird perched upon a green bough, each child holding its fond mother’s hand, has solved the riddle and carries the answer in its face. That Life which brought you to birth, O Man! Is nobler and greater than your farthest thought; believe in its beneficent intention towards you and obey its subtle injunctions whispered to your heart in half-felt intuitions.

7. The man, who thinks he may live as freely as his unconsidered desires prompt him and yet not carry the burden of an eventual reckoning, is binding his life to a hollow dream. Whoever sins against his fellows or against himself pronounces his own sentence thereby. He may hide his sins from the sight of others, but he cannot hide them from the all-recording eyes of the gods. Justice still rules the world with inexorable weight, though its operations are often unseen and though it is not always to be found in stone-built courts of law. Whoever escapes from paying the just penalties, which the gods impose, Nemesis -remorseless and implacable -holds such a man in jeopardy every hour.

8. Those that have been held under the bitter waters of sorrow, those who have moved through shadowed years in the mist of tears, will be somewhat readier to receive the truth which life is ever silently voicing. If they can perceive nothing else, they can perceive the tragically transience, which attends the smiles of fortune. Those who refuse to be deluded by their brighter hours will not suffer so greatly from their darker ones. There is no life that is not made up of the warp of pleasure and the woof of suffering. Therefore no man can afford to walk with proud and pontifical air. He who does so takes his perambulation at a grave peril. For humility is the only befitting robe to wear in the presence of the unseen gods, who may remove in a few days what has been acquired during many years. The fate of all things moves in cycles and only the thoughtless observer can fail to note this fact. Even in the universe it may be seen that every perihelion is succeeded by an aphelion. So in the life and fortunes of man, the ebb of privation may succeed the flood of prosperity, health may be a fickle guest, while love may come only to wander again. But when the night of protracted agony dies, the dawn of newfound wisdom glimmers. The last lesson of these things is that the eternal refuge in man, unnoticed and unsought as it may be, must become what it was once -his solace, or disappointment and suffering will periodically conspire to drive him in upon it. No man is so lucky that the gods permit him to avoid these two great tutors of the race.

9. A man will feel safe, protected, secure, only when he discovers that the radiant wings of sublimity enfold him. While he persists in remaining unillumined his best inventions shall become his worst impediments, and everything that draws him closer to the material frame of things shall become another knot he must later untie. For he is inseparably allied to his ancient past, he stands always in the presence of his inner divinity and cannot shake it off. Let him, then, not remain unwitting of this fact but deliver himself, his worldly cares and secret burdens into the beautiful care of his better self and it shall not fail him. Let him do this, if he would live with gracious peace and die with fearless dignity.

10. No dust can ever settle on the grave grandeur of these ancient truths, though they have lain in time since the early days of our race. No people have ever existed but have also received intimations of this deeper life, which is open to man. Whoever is ready to accept them must not only apprehend these truths with his intelligence, until they sparkle among his thoughts like stars among the asteroids, but must appropriate them with his heart until they inspire him to diviner action.