Brihadaranyaka Upanishad-2

An Equal Half

Hinduism regards man and woman as the two halves of the eternal being, each constituting a vibrant, existential part, quite incomplete in itself. In the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, Prajapati, the primordial God, divides himself into two-man and woman, the symbols of cosmic polarity deriving sustenance from the same source.

The Hindu woman as life partner has a fourfold character: she is ardhangini, one half of the her husband, metaphorically speaking; sahadharmini, an associate in the fulfilment of human and divine goals; sahakarmini, a part to all her husband’s action and sahayogini, a veritable co-operator in all his ventures. Husband and wife together are called dampati, joint owners of the household, sharing work in terms of their biological, psychological and individual dharma. The former provides the seed (bija) and the latter the field for its fructification, so that humans could be perpetuating in the cosmic process of evolution. Both have the joint responsibility of helping their children grow in all respects, but the contribution of the wife is always immense.

As life partner the Hindu woman has equal right to participate in religious right to participate in religious rites and ceremonies; in fact, certain sacrifices like the Sita harvest sacrifice, the Rudrayaga for suitable sons-in-law or the Rudrabali sacrifice for material prosperity are performed by women alone. Hindu lawgivers like Gobhila and Asvalayana ordain that no ritual or sacrifice can be complete (sampurna) without the presence of the wife. Even Rama had to order for Sita’s statue in gold to make up for her absence during this asvamedha sacrifice. In the Ramayana, Rama’s mother Kausalya offers oblations to the fire god Agni and Tara performs the Svastyayana ritual for the success of her husband Bali against Sugriva. Women of those days were quite learned in the Vedic lore. Draupadi was a brahmavadini  and Tara an adept at reciting mystic syllables. Oghavati, Arundhati and Sulabha possessed a thorough knowledge of the Vedas and imparted religious knowledge even to rishis. The spiritual attainments of Savitri and Anusuya have become legendary. In the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad one meets women of wisdom such as Maitreyi and Gargi. The former abandoned wealth for wisdom and the latter entered into a debate with sage Yajnavalkya at the court of King Janaka . Much later, Bharati, the wife of Mandana Misra, carried forward the tradition by acting as judge in the philosophic debate between her husband and Shankaracharya. When she found her husband losing the debate, she emphatically told Shankaracharya that his victory would be complete only if he could defeat her, since she constituted her husband’s better half.

Where women are honoured, there the gods are pleased; but where they are not honoured, no sacred rites yield rewards. ‘Offspring, (due performance of) religious rites, faithful service, the highest conjugal happiness and heavenly bliss for the ancestors and oneself depend on one’s wife alone’.

Manu declares that the perfect man is one who constitutes a trinity made up of his wife, himself and their off spring, the wife being a gift from the Gods; she ought to be supported to the end of her life. If Manu points out of seductive nature of women, he is equally unsure of the unbridled passion of men. He advises that wise men must not be in the company of even their own mothers, sisters or daughters in a lonely place, for they may deviate from the right path! Manu regards woman as a precious unit of the family and of society but denies them absolute freedom due to their physical vulnerability. He, however, distinguishes between the noble and virtuous and the degenerate women, and like other smrtikaras criticizes those who are faithless, fickle, sensuous, immodest, quarrelsome and loose. ‘Day and night women must be kept in dependence upon males and if the attached themselves to sensual enjoyments they must be kept under one’s control’. Manu prescribes capital punishment for killers of women, exempts pregnant and old women from paying fines and suggests that as mater of courtesy, they should be given precedence when crossing the road.

He meant thereby that they were not different from each other. The Hindu scriptures lay emphasis on harmony between husband and wife that is so essential for family peace and prosperity. Harmony requires understanding, which can only be among equals. In the Rig Veda, the couple jointly prays: ‘May all Devas and Apas unite our hearts. May Matarisva, dhata, Destri all bind us close.’

The highest duty of man and wife says Manu, is to be faithful to each other. While the supreme duty of the husband is to safeguard his wife, to care for her needs and necessities, and to keep her happy with gift and presents, the wife is expected to be pious and chaste, sincere and faithful to her partner, gentle, suave, skilled and sweet- tongued.

Although the concept of pati-paramesvara (regarding one’s husband as god) has suffered an erosion in the wake of women’s empowerment, respect for the husband continues, as is evident from the observance by Hindu women of such traditional vows as Vata Savitri, Haritalika and Karka Chaturthi - all aimed at a long and happy conjugal life.

Nowhere do the accredited Hindu scriptures ordain that women should be abused, disgraced, chastised without reason or divorced in ordinary circumstances. Yet expectation from women as life partners has been many and varied. The best female partner, according to a popular Sanskrit adage, is one who renders advice like a minister, obeys like a maidservant, feeds like a mother, pleases like the nymph Rambha, acts as a veritable companion, and has the forbearance of Mother Earth.

But, Sexual pleasure is no pleasure at all. It is a mental delusion. These beautiful women and wealth are the instruments of Maya to delude you and entrap you into her nets.

Some ignorant people say: “It is not right to check passion. We must not go against nature. Why has God created young beautiful women? There must be some sense, in His creation. We should enjoy them and procreate as many as possible. We should keep up the progeny of the line. If all people become sannyasins and go to forests, what will become of this world? It will come to an end. If we check passion,

What is this sex energy? This energy, this sex energy, is a manifestation of God. It is Brahman in dynamic expression. It is Shakti, Para Shakti. We all know that this phenomenal universe is the activity of the cosmic power calls this which is illimitable, indescribable and infinite. We call this cosmic power Para Shakti, Maha Shakti, Maha Maya or Prakriti.

The sex instinct is most powerful. The sex urge is formidable. It may conceal itself in underground compartments in the mind and assail you when you are not vigilant. It will attack you with redoubled force. Visvamitra fell a victim of Menaka. Another great Rishi became a prey to Rambha. Jaimini got excited by false woman Masa. A powerful Rishi was excited by the sight of the mating of a fish. A householder aspirant carried away even his guru’s wife. Many aspirants are not aware of this secret urge, a treacherous enemy. They think that they are quite safe and pure. When they are put to test, they become hopeless victims